That no one knew about ..and no one ever saw..How cool would that be!! Just think ..It would never go extinct or owt!
Anyway..On sunday,Whilst housesitting..I made a shocking discovery!One of the hamster's was not in it's cage..I dipped my hand cautiously in to the vast amount's of shredded paper...poking around trying to feel for it..No luck..
Panic starts to come in waves..I pace the room..
Think woman! It can't be far,Surely!Shit..Where's the cat!
Pull out the sofa..TV cabinet..Bookcase..Shake the cat.. Nothing!
I give up ..Sealing the living room off like a crime scene as I go..If it's in there,It aint getting out..Right?
Try to sleep but have images of it gnawing away at my face as I sleep..Can they climb stairs? And how am I gonna get outta this one..
"Sorry..Ive lost ya hamster..Ohh...Ya sky's not working?..Ummm..Maybe it's chewed through the wiring or something"
Anyway..To cut a very long story short..My well rehearsed speech..Full of .."But I am really sorry..I just dunno how it got out" ..Was met with laughter..
You see..there was no hamster in the cage! I had been dropping peices of apple..And plump juicy raisens into an empty fucking cage!! It had died the week before and as not to upset the kids..He'd not told them..Or me for that matter! At least I did'nt lose it.. 
brokendownangel
Pro

...you've been feeding an imaginary hamster and letting it escape to run riot around the living space...

- That brought back a few memories of searching for escaped pets of all descriptions when the kids were small!
I SCREAMED and chucked the shoes across the room, and hubby came running to see what had happened to me! I was shaking like a leaf and he had to get rid of it for me.

BOL! You daft bat! At least you left him with a cage full of mouldy bits of apple to clear out x