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Posts archive for: November, 2009
  • Bullying...

    It comes in many forms..Emotional,physhical,mental..whichever way the bully chooses to demonstrate thier 'power'  it's wrong..

    Bullies tend to dislike themselves so bully others to deflect from thier own flaws..

    My youngest is being  bullied on a daily basis at school ..Mainly by the same girl..Who 'employs'  herself a few minion's to do her dirty work aswell..Safety in numbers you see! I noticed her withdrawing so asked her if there was a problem with school..Took me a while to get it from her what was happening..

    She was being called 'names' such as 'Four eyed freak '..'Retard'..'Spastic'.. Getting pinched,scratched and excluded by 4 or 5 children in her class..They were also knocking what little confidence she had outta her..And it had been going on for a few months..As she was telling me all this,she was trying so hard not to cry..As was I.

    Her 'Crime'...she wears thick glasses and uses a sloping board in class! Therefore she is different from the other's...making her a perfect target for bullies...

    I had previously told her to ignore bullies as she was better than them..And "stick and stones" and such..but when you see your child like that and knowing that they have to sit with those bullies and listen to them say  those things.. It broke my heart and angered me so much!

    The next morning I spoke to her teacher about the situation..But not feeling my best what with being so tired and run down I ended up sobbing about the whole thing!She promised to sort it out  straight away and youngest informed me that the Head had spoke to the bullies and it was being dealt with.. that was last week..

    However..tonight I had to drop her off at a after school event...She went running over to her group,the bullies included..Who immediatly moved away from her as if  she was scum! Then the 'ring leader' was handing out sweets..To everyone..Excluding my child...Just another way of showing her 'power'..And excluding her a little bit more. ...Then they had to pair up to walk to the event and she was the one left standing alone and 3 chose to go together so no one had to go with her.. she looked so sad just standing there..And ya know..It's not like she's a naughty child,or horrible to other's..Far from it! She is just a victim of bullying..

    After I waved her off I sat in my car and sobbed my eyes out as I feel so helpless..What am I meant to do to help her? Do I have to go as far as talking to the bullies parents?..im not good at talking when im feeling like this..I fear Id kill them..

    The school say they are dealing with it..But I witnessed it first hand tonight..And god did that hurt me as a Mother! Its still happening and I can't see it ending anytime soon.. I don't want to have to move her schools as she has so much extra help there and only has 2 years left..But I fear I may have too.

    I am going to attempt to speak to the Head tomorrow morning..but only if this big lump is gone from my throat..Otherwise i may something i might regret..Or look like a numpty again!

     

     

  • For J...

    How We Survive

    If we are fortunate,
    we are given a warning.

    If not,
    there is only the sudden horror,
    the wrench of being torn apart;
    of being reminded
    that nothing is permanent,
    not even the ones we love,
    the ones our lives revolve around.

    Life is a fragile affair.
    We are all dancing
    on the edge of a precipice,
    a dizzying cliff so high
    we can't see the bottom.

    One by one,
    we lose those we love most
    into the dark ravine.

    So we must cherish them
    without reservation.
    Now.
    Today.
    This minute.
    We will lose them
    or they will lose us
    someday.
    This is certain.
    There is no time for bickering.
    And their loss
    will leave a great pit in our hearts;
    a pit we struggle to avoid
    during the day
    and fall into at night.

    Some,
    unable to accept this loss,
    unable to determine
    the worth of life without them,
    jump into that black pit
    spiritually or physically,
    hoping to find them there.

    And some survive
    the shock,
    the denial,
    the horror,
    the bargaining,
    the barren, empty aching,
    the unanswered prayers,
    the sleepless nights
    when their breath is crushed
    under the weight of silence
    and all that it means.

    Somehow, some survive all that and,
    like a flower opening after a storm,
    they slowly begin to remember
    the one they lost
    in a different way...

    The laughter,
    the irrepressible spirit,
    the generous heart,
    the way their smile made them feel,
    the encouragement they gave
    even as their own dreams were dying.

    And in time, they fill the pit
    with other memories
    the only memories that really matter.

    We will still cry.
    We will always cry.
    But with loving reflection
    more than hopeless longing.

    And that is how we survive.
    That is how the story should end.
    That is how they would want it to be.

    ~Mark Rickerby~

    And that's how it was when you left J.. Those first day's..Month's.....almost  2years ago now..Nearly broke us as a family...But we all closed ranks and were there for each other.. We have survived without you..but it's hard..Not a day goes by when I don't think about you..Tell you I love you.

    But I should have done it then..

    Today is your birthday..

    Where ever you are..Know that you are missed..And loved.. Happy Birthday J xxx

    7/11/1972~7/3/2008

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